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Tuesday, October 02, 2007

A Dog's Life...

It's me, Kipper, and I am back again. I knew you all missed me so I asked my Mom if I could blog about Dog Night. After all, I am the family expert on Ritter's Frozen Custard and their monthly Dog Nights. I am certified and everything. And house broken but that is another story. It was a rough day for me. I know you will all feel really, really sorry for me. Try not to cry too much. My cat Lucy felt a little bit sorry for me but my other cat, Henry, well, he just laughed about it. Henry doesn't have a lot of compassion you see. *HE* has never had to go to to the groomer. That boy and I need to talk about the real world sometime. Hmpf. Now, I will tell you that I am usually ever so well behaved at the groomer but yesterday was just not my day. They took me into the doggie area and shut the gate. It was at that moment that I decided I *wanted* my Mom. I tried to get to her by pushing through the gate. Bad move Dude. I.G.O.T.S.T.U.C.K. Uh huh. They could not push me in either direction. Mom says I am a weeny (whatever that means) so that is why I was crying but Dude! IT hurt! I thought I was gonna die. I saw my life flash before my eyes and that part about me flunking puppy school was, well, it made me mad. When I saw that, I wriggled my tushie like crazy and pulled myself out. Now, the groomer felt really bad. I thought that my Mom would like hit her or sue her for my distress or something but you know what? My Mom laughed! Like she laughed a lot! Can you believe that? And all she could say was how bad she felt that she did not grab her camera and take a picture. I think someone should call the authorities. This lady is a bad doggie parent. She should have been like all distressed and sad and flopping on the floor or something. Nope, she was laughing and worrying about NOT getting a picture. Dude! AND, like would you believe that she made me get a bath and a trim and a nail cut anyway? This woman is outta control. Like so bad. But, in the end, I got to go to Ritter's. My favorite place. I got my usual bowl of vanilla with a dog bone in it. As usual it was good. As usual, my Mom took pictures of other dogs and made a spectacle of herself over them. This is me and the old man. I take him along so he can pay. I never seem to have any money. I was sticking my tongue out at my Mom. I think she so deserved it. This is me with my old man and sissy. I usually let them be in at least one picture with me. These are my friends...this one is Penelope. She is a Newfie. My Mom LOVES Newfies. She embarrassed herself hugging them. Old Pen came with her human Mom and Dad but also her doggie Mom, Pamela, and her new baby girl, Poppet. Would you believe that Poppet is only 2 months old and is twice my size? I refuse to post that picture of her with me 'cause I already have enough size issues. This is my gal pal Missy with another new friend, Lucky. Lucky is something called a chocolate Lab. Missy and I both tasted him but we did not think he tasted good at all. Of course, we are not allowed to eat chocolate so Lucky was safe. Lucky was trying to look all sweet and that but Dude! He like pee pee'd all over. Really uncool little dude. This little guy is Manny. He has more size issues than me. He is really small. I like that in a dog. This is my buddy Rupert. Rupert ate a napkin after his ice cream was gone. Then he tried to eat a spoon. This guy is way cool! My buddy Dusty. I still don't know why they call him Dusty. He is never really dirty or anything. This cute girl is Gilda. Gilda is only 1 year old but she is really smart and fun and behaves really well. I like that in a girl. My old pal Stanley. He is one great guy. Always agreeable, always has a joke to tell. I don't know if you remember our dog night post 2 months ago (Wasn't it unforgettable??) but Sprinkles was there. She was 2 months old then and wow has she grown! She is pretty friendly and very pretty but way too young for me. And she kisses my Mom and Dad a lot. This makes me feel jealous and you wouldn't like me if I was too jealous... Okay Sprinkles. You are awfully pretty...even if you do kiss a lot. Now, can you believe that my mom went to Dog Night and forgot to re-charge her picture taking thing? I just slapped my head and said, "D'uh". So, these were the only pictures she got. Bad move Mom. Still, she got one of me driving home. Traffic was light so the old man let me have a turn at the wheel. I am sure glad that my mom let me come visit you again. I really should take over her blog but I am just waaaay too busy. Keepin' an eye on this family is mighty hard work. So, for now, I am outta here Dude. See ya!
Hugs, Kipper


Jen said...

Do you have short dog-man syndrome? LOL

Glad the "old man" took you for ice cream and paid too!

SusieQ said...

Dear Kipper,

I have stolen my Mom's computer and her avatar (I don't really look like that thank God)and I am writing to tell you that you and I need to do lunch sometime and invite a few of your buddies to come along.

I was especially impressed with your one buddy who eats used napkins sticky with melted custard. He has taste. Let's be sure to invite him. We could go for those used napkins and then if we can find any used Kleenex, boy that makes for a tasty treat too.

Let me know.

Do you think I should start my own blog? Just wondering.

Max, the collie

P.S. sorry about your grooming mishap with the gate. I've had days like that myself.

Alice said...

Hi, Kipper, my new puppy Maggie is only 10 weeks old and she'd like to ask you to take it easy on those who still pee-pee all over the place. Sometimes accidents happen, ya know. Mr. LambiePie, her stuffed toy, has quite a different opinion on the matter but he's in the washing machine right now.

Andi said...

Kip, my Mom makes me go to the groomer too!!! Like what's with that...I have short hair so there's nothing to groom. But they give me a bath and trim my toenails. My Mom carries on like a crazy woman about how handsome I look when they tie one of those silly bandana things on me. I get special ones for every holiday.

Talk about puppy abuse. When I was just a young pup my Mom dressed me in a sweater for Christmas! Man, we live in Florida!!! Do you think I really needed a sweater. It felt like a straight jacket and I walked around like that's what it was. Do you think she would take the silly thing off me? No!!! She just laughed and laughed like your Mom did when you were caught in the gate! There should be a law against dog sweaters in the South!

Gotta run now Kip. I hear Dad in the kitchen and he might drop something I want on the floor. I'm pretty fast!

Take care and watch out for those gates! Bully

Valerie said...

yo, Kip. Elvis the WunderKat here. realizing that we're supposed to be enemies, but dude. DO NOT let the humans embarass you again by laughing when you get stuck. when my people laugh at me, i do one of three things. i either pretend that my box is full and then drop a log or two right where they walk. barefooted. at three a.m. funny as all git out.

there's two other things, but i'm too busy laughing at the last time the girl stepped in poo.

BittersweetPunkin said...

..Sounds like a very full day!!!What do they say about a dog's life?? LOL! My cats enjoyed the post very much too btw!!

Pamela said...

Loved this post.
I want to try that frozen custard.
You suppose Kipper will share.

I want a Newf, too.
Big dogs are so nice to have when home alone.

I only have a cat now - and she was declawed when I got her at the Humane Society. So much for her scratching any intruders buttocks.

Anonymous said...

Dear Kipper,
My name is Dolly and I am a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. I have a few issues with being a petite girl. I bark and no one seems to take me seriously.

Hey we have nothing like dog night in St. Louis. Is that ice cream stuff good??

My mom and I were thrilled to see you visited our blog.
Hope to talk to you again soon.

Dolly and her mom Connie

Mary said...

I think Kipper needs his own laptop and a wireless card! Too cute!

Terri and Bob said...

I take my old man with me too so he can pay. Isn't that interesting?

Cool beans.

Rosemary said...

I love dog night!!
The cutest thing I have seen lately.
Ice cream sounds good too.

Sugar Bear said...

I love your posts and I do remember your last one! You are king of custard night!

PEA said...

Well, Kipper, as usual I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your adventures and don't bite me but I would have laughed too, to see you stuck in that gate! lol Yikes, what was that nip for??? I was laughing WITH you, not AT you! Sheesh! I also enjoyed meeting all your friends you met for ice cream. And Kipper? You look real nice after your grooming:-) xox

justabeachkat said...


My Mom's a sweetie pie (but she likes her picture taker too), so come live with us. You won't be sorry. We'll spoil you like crazy.

I'm going to the groomers tomorrow so I'll be nice and fluffy and oh so pretty when you arrive.

Come on dude, living here at the beach is fun.

Miss Daisy (from the house of Kat)

Dawn Bibbs said...

Kipper, are quite the typist/blogger. You should see if your mom will buy you a laptop or something. Then you can blog anytime you feel like is. Shoot, I'm sure there are more times than not, that you just wanna get some things off your hairy chest. That's what blogging is for.

By the way, those sure are some cute friends you've got there. I'm especially fond of that little chocolate cutie. Probably because my Trae is part Chocolate Lab. (the other part is a Boxer). Hey, maybe one day I'll let you two meet. He drools a lot...are you alright with that? That's the main reason I don't let him use my computer. Do you know how much keyboards are?

Anyway, it was nice talking to you. Have a good night, dude!

BTW, sorry you got stuck at the groomers...of ALL places, huh?